Trying on a new layout for size. I don't like it.
I'm thinking that I may try my hand at coding a new one. We'll see.

Anyway, what's new in the Romiglio house? Well, Lucas cut his first tooth this past weekend. I won't lie, I'm having a tough time with it. Being a mom is a funny thing, really. You work and work to try to get your child to the next milestone, the next big development, and then when it happens you weep because you've lost just a little bit more of the dependence you've been relying on. Being a mom is all about being "needed". And with each little growth marker, he's less dependent on me. In a way, I look at my husband and I'm jealous. He gets to enjoy each development and feel nothing but pride. He doesn't grieve it with me. And he doesn't really understand why I need to grieve such a happy occasion. I don't necessarily understand it. Is this my own little case of postpartum depression? I mean, I'm not 100% upset about his development. I'm 90% proud, excited and happy. But that 10% of me that feels lost and anxious seems to creep up. I mean, who cries over a tooth? Anyone with me?

Although this is a huge development for Lucas, I have been more concerned with Heather, lately. Her business is her business, so I'll keep details out of it, but I feel bad for her. She's going through a tough break-up and unfortunately the friends she's closest to near home (Boston) are less than helpful to her. I live a good 45 minutes away, and it's hard for me to get out there. There's so much going on, and I have to be home. My schedule changes by the minute and I feel terrible that she has had to come out here for support. I mean, I was less than helpful with her last breakup and she lived down the street. I had my reasons, and whether they were right or wrong, doesn't matter now. A best girl friend's job is to show up at your door, with ice cream (that you are too nauseous to eat), horror movies (that you won't be able to concentrate on, but are mindless enough that you can still follow the non-existent plot), maybe a bottle of wine, and just be there to offer a shoulder if nothing else. But instead, the best I can offer is for her to come here and I can do my best here. It breaks my heart. I hope that our girls' night out helped take her mind off of it, if nothing else. I'll tell you, she certainly had some fans on her night out, so if nothing else I hope it was a boost to her self esteem.
I always have trouble finding the right words when someone is grieving. I tend to do a lot of listening, and give small bits of advice. Most of my advice is how to deal with the current moment. I don't like to give advice about how to deal long-term. Usually because I feel like things could change at any moment. I also have a tough time finding the right words quickly enough. I usually find myself saying "Ugh, you idiot. You should have told her....blah blah blah...".
So in that spirit, I hope she knows that this is not the end of her life. I am fully aware that it feels like the world is crumbling around her. And she needs to embrace that feeling, let it take over and then rise up. It's going to take time, and I hope she knows that I will be there, to the best of my ability, every step of the way. She will find someone, when the time is right for both of them. He will be her perfect match, and she will know that it's right. Sounds cliche, but when you know - you know. I hope she knows that she is strong, and independent and she will get through this. She has so much going for her, and she is someone to be cherished and appreciated. She will look back on this relationship with mixed emotions for the rest of her life. No matter the outcome, she will look back and wonder. A girl always looks back at her first real love and wonder. But she will grow to a point, with the right person, that she will no longer wonder. She will look back and enjoy the happy times, and the less than perfect memories will fade.
It's hard to get past a first love, but it's possible. You'll get through, and I hope you know that we are here for you. Also, eat something. Don't make yourself sick! You'll waste away!