Saturday, September 24, 2011

Bandwagon? Sure, I'll hop on!

Ok, Ok. I'll bite the bullet, and follow the crowd. Maybe then I'll be asked to sit at the cool-blogger's table at lunch time.

A. Age: 27. 
B. Bed size: King, finally.
C. Chore that you hate: All of them? I'm not good at being domestic. Pet fur is the worst! 
D. Dogs: One poopie puppy, named Scooby. Actually her name is Spooky, but we call her Scooby. What?
E. Essential start to your day: Music. must have music.
F. Favourite color: Mustard, and most blues
G. Gold or Silver: Silver usually, but I'm becoming a bigger fan of gold. 
H. Height: 5' 
I. Instruments you play: Violin
J. Job title: Mom/Wife/Student/Bookkeeper/SocialMediaAddict
K. Kids: One for now, Lucas
L. Live: MA
M. Mother's name: Sue 
N. Nicknames: I dont really have any...? Boring!
O. Overnight hospital stays: Birthing a child, oh and that time I swallowed a binder clip. Don't ask. 
P. Pet peeve: Misusing words, and/or using hurtful/derogatory words. 
Q. Quote from a movie: "They were cooooooones" - Wedding Singer
R. Right or left handed: Right
S. Siblings: 2, 1 sister, 1 brother but I swear they are from a different planet sometimes
T. Time you wake up: T/r - 6:30, all other days 9ish, or whenever Lucas wakes up (usually 9:30ish)
U. Underwear: Indeed. 
V. Vegetable you hate: Beets, oh I can't get down with beets.
W. What makes you run late: Everything. Usually my laziness, or procrastinating
X. X-Rays you've had: My pelvis when I was younger, my throat (damn binder clip).
Y. Yummy food that you make: I make a damn good beef stew, and roasted chicken, and lasagna. Mmm I'm hungry. 
Z. Zoo animal: Elephants, Monkeys, Polar Bears... I don't think there are any I dislike.  

Friday, September 23, 2011

Mentally Ill, Simply ill?

I should really rename my blog "In Response to Nerdy Apple". This is the third time.

Tonight, via twitter, Nerdy Apple (and Morgan @the818.com) pondered why mentally ill people need to be called "mentally ill" and not simply ill. While I agree with her sentiments about the stigma of mental illness, I think dropping the "mentally" in "mentally ill" in all cases would be a serious disservice.

My mother suffers from depression & PTSD. She is on full disability due to her mental illness. I can tell you, from personal experience, that she has to qualify her "disability" to everyone that she tells about it. For example, when she goes to the hairdresser, or runs into someone from high school, and she's asked "So what do you do for a living?", my mother responds "I can't work anymore, I'm on disability". At which point, she gets shifty looks from people. They immediately assume she is scamming the system, because there is clearly nothing physically wrong with her. She has to always respond "I have depression, I'm on mental disability" and then BAM, here comes the stigma. People don't know how to talk to her. They tend to quiet up. My mother tends to laugh off her mental illness, in the face of adversity. She doesn't know what else to do, so she laughs. It's a mostly nerves.

If all people with mental illnesses were to simply be referred to as "ill", I think they would run into the same problem. It could also pose another problem. When I hear the word "ill" I think of colds, or the flu, and I think "Oh no, are you contagious?". I know that's not true of all illnesses, but I'd be willing to bet that a social experiment would find people backing away from people who refer to themselves as ill. So, I suppose its a case of deciding which is the lesser of two evils in this case?

Most people assume anyone with a mental illness is crazy, or wildly unstable. Most people are wildly misguided about what it means to have a mental illness. Many times they are actually chemical imbalances, or lasting effects of past trauma. There is a sad stigma associate with all mental illness, depression included, but I don't feel that dropping the "mental" will save anyone from that stigma. It may force them to need to qualify their illness with an explanation, which may be harder in the long run.

What say you? Am I way off base here? Input is always welcome!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Is that my face on Babble?

It is indeed my face on babble

I have been an avid follower of Monica @ thegirlwho.net for as long as I've been reading blogs, which in truth is only about 4 years. She recently started writing for Babble and put word out via Twitter and Facebook that she was writing about photos of that first moment with a new baby. I tweeted one to her, and there I am. Oddly enough this is probably about the.... 20th? photo of me and Lucas because I have photos of the entire birth. I was lucky enough to deliver Lucas right at a shift change, so the midwife that was scheduled to go home actually offered to stay and take photos for us, so that John could fully concentrate on enjoying the experience. I have photos of Lucas crowning, I even have a photo of me pulling him out & onto my chest with my last push. Needless to say, those are very private photos that have only been shared with my closest family and friends. The photo in the link above is the first "world" appropriate photo, and even still the kid is copping a feel!

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Strangest night.

So... I'm feeling kind blah today. Mama's guilt after a bad bedtime routine today.

I'm sitting on my couch trying to get in touch with a dude on craigslist about an elliptical, and I feel a migraine coming on. It had started this afternoon, but I managed to soften it with some delicious fountain diet coke.

I decide around 10 pm that I should probably take an Exedrin and eat something. But in the process, I somehow forget to swallow the pills immediately, and instead I hold them in my mouth with some flat soda (don't judge). Well, that was a bad idea. Gross. I swallow the disgustingmess, and decide to take a bath and read my book.

Now, we haven't been using the bathtub upstairs lately, so I completely forgot to grab the tub stopper from downstairs (long story) until after I got undressed, and let the water warm up. Ugh.. back downstairs.

I lounge in the tub for a bit, and then I decide to stand up and let the warm water run over me from the shower before getting out. I always do this because I feel a little grungy after laying in the bath. I don't know why. But did I remember to close the shower curtain? Nooooo... so there's water all over the floor when I get out.

I had brought two towels into the bathroom, one for my hair, one for my body. I decide to use one towel to mop up the water on the floor and the other to dry myself. I dry off, throw the towel on my hair while I put on some lotion, and I hear the med-flight helicopter. I think nothing of it until I can SEE THE MAN DRIVING through my skylight. Oh wonderful. Here I am, naked, rubbing lotion on my legs, with a helicopter pilot staring at me. I forgot that the pine tree that obstructed the view had been taken down, and we live a block away from a hospital. GREAT.

Now, I'm sitting on my couch again, wearing a Daggermouth t-shirt, betty boop pj pants, and a lightening mcqueen towel on my wet hair waiting for my water to boil for tea. I always feel a little bit like a drug dealer when I have to spoon out my loose leaf tea from Tealuxe, but it really is the best. My neighbors must think I'm out of my mind.

Oh, and my head still hurts.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Tattoo Tirade

I know, I know another tattoo post. I JUST posted one a few weeks ago, but a little discussion with a professor today has me slightly irritated, and I just need to vent about it for a moment.

So today in my Retail Management & Teamwork class (aka, pointless 1 credit class that is mandatory to my major), we were talking about paradigms and perspective. We were assigned some reading in 7 Habits of Highly Effective People,  and were asked to talk about a time when we underwent a personal paradigm shift. (See here if you're already lost). Basically, talk about a time when your assumptions and perspective got in the way of judgement-free thought. My shift, for example, was the inevitable paradigm shift of pre-baby to post-baby. Saying things like "when I have kids they will never...blah blah", and then realizing once you have kids that there is no "never".

As the class members took turns, the professor interrupted to explain her mini-paradigm shift which involved believing that people with disabilities were inherently evil. Let me explain that she thought this way as a very young child, because the only person in the neighborhood that her family wasn't close to happened to be an amputee. Her family never talked about it, so she made childish assumptions, which she now realizes are ridiculous. Then the final classmate shares her paradigm shift, which had something to do with growing up thinking that all people with tattoos were criminals or bad people. I chuckled, because that's funny. My friend piped in with "Oh Nicole, you better keep that sweatshirt on." Her statement kind of forced me into the spotlight and I felt like I had to explain given that the professor was looking at me like was crazy.

I can't remember my exact wording, but I said something to the effect that while this particular classmates perception may have changed, many people still treat people with tattoos as if they were criminals. Well this sent my professor on a tirade about tattoos, and how people who get them are craving attention, and that tattoos are a form of acting out that is the most dangerous because unlike dying your hair or dressing "weird" tattoos are permanent. I just nodded, and let her say her piece. She continued on to say that she realizes that people with tattoos can be intelligent, productive members of society, but since her generation typically is "anti" tattoo, and they are the generation that will be "doing the hiring", she doesn't understand why people would get tattoos thereby rendering themselves "unemployable". Again, I didn't say much. She went even further to tell a story about a student she had, a few semesters ago, who was covered in tattoos, and seemed to be pretty "dumb" (her words). However, upon reading the student's papers, she realized that the girl was actually extremely bright, but a little shy. Once she opened up the professor was floored by how brilliant she actually was. She's not surprised, however, to see that this girl is still working at the college, because she "probably can't get a job anywhere else".

The amount of absurdity in her entire argument made me laugh (internally). I didn't argue with her, because I know better than to argue with someone that is set in their ways, and who will be giving me a grade. But if I had been able to discuss it further, without my grade being affected, I would have posed the following questions to her.

  1. Why, in a class about being judgement-free in our interactions with other people, is it OK to judge people based on a lifestyle choice? It's wrong to judge someone based on them being disabled, or their skin color, but it's o to judge someone for intentionally having multi-colored skin?
  2. How does she know that this young lady didn't aspire to be working at a college? Who are you to judge the quality of her life, her decision of employment, or to assume that it was all dependent upon her tattoos?
  3. Do you think I'm unemployable? I can easily put on a long sleeve shirt, and fit the mold of what the older generation feels is "professional". I am more than capable of performing well in whatever career path I chose. Do my tattoos render me useless? Can I collect disability for that? (a joke, a joke)
  4. Are you forgetting that my generation will be the one to take care of your generation at some point? Don't you think it would be wise to treat us well? (Not a threat, but a serious consideration since the class is about 'reaping what you sow" and how to effectively improve relationships)
I was astounded. I mean, clearly I realize that I will be judged for being tattooed. I realize that some people may be offended, and will expect me to cover them up for work. I was smart enough to get tattoos that are easily covered up for such occasions. I just expected a professor, especially teaching this class, to be a little bit more open-minded.

I kind of wish nothing had been said about me, so that once the semester was over I could finally reveal my "rebellious" ways, and prove to her that my skin has no breaking whatsoever on my ability to learn, connect with people, interact with people, and be an effective and productive member of society, provided that people to prejudge me based solely on my skin ornamentation. 

photo courtsey of stock.xchng

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Brimfield

I realize that today is 9/11, and this may seem like a tasteless post. However, I took some time to reflect this morning, and I decided that the best way that I can honor those that were taken from us, and those that continue to fight for our freedom, is to keep on living in the face of adversity. I want to maintain a sense of normalcy in a world that will never be the same.

I had a "girls night", of sorts, on Friday night. Heather and I were once like sisters. We lived together for a period, worked together, and spent nearly everyday together. Due to a combination of bad feelings, and life decisions, our friendship came to an abrupt halt a little over a year ago. It was tough for me to get over, but I was being stubborn, and i think that she'll agree that she can be just as stubborn as I am. I think we both made mistakes, and we finally decided to put the past away recently and grab dinner.

Well dinner led to plans to go to the Brimfield fair. Since Heather lives in Boston, we decided it made more sense for her to come sleep over and then we'd wake up early and head to Brimfield. We were supposed to chat about accounting homework, and eat treats on Friday night, but life found a way to make us sit around and polish off a bottle of wine while chatting about boys, life and other gossipy topics. In true "girls night" fashion, we sat around for hours chatting and catching up. I even managed to squeeze an apology in there. It was time to own up to my mistakes, and my unfair treatment of a good friend.

At any rate, we woke up at 7am after having gone to bed at 2am. I can't tell you the last time I stayed up till 2 am drinking wine and chatting with a gal pal. I put my best foot forward, though. My tummy was NOT happy, but a greasy breakfast sandwich helped a little. We were SO not prepared for just how large Brimfield really is. We arrived at 8 am, and walked around for about three hours. We didn't really have a plan in mind. Neither of us was there in search of anything, but just wanted to see what it was all about.

We both agreed that next year, we need to come with a plan and some cash that we tuck away throughout the year! There were so many treasures; so many DIY projects just waiting to be taken home. The clothes... holy shit the clothes. I couldn't even bring myself to pick through them because I wanted to take them all home. There was a  powder blue sweater dress similar to the one that Pee Wee wears in "Pee Wee's Big Adventure", I definitely had to stop myself from buying it.

Next year I want to go for two days. One day focus on clothes, and the next on the other stuff. There were a few booths FULL of vintage Pyrex & Fiesta ware. There was tons of vintage shoes, hats and other accessories. My favorite booth, however, had a variety of tie-dyed dresses. Tons of vintage style dresses, with a dark tie-dye pattern. I realize how awful it sounds, but it was AMAZING. I had a tough time walking away. I wanted them all. I didn't dare peek at the price tags. The furniture was like something out of a dream, with price tags that ran the gamut.  You could find a fixer-upper Victorian style couch for $10, or a completely restored vintage hutch that would make you weak in the knees for a couple thousand dollars.

My thrifting adventures for the next few weekends will be focusing on finding myself a vintage wool cloche, maybe a good coat, and some boots for sure. Suggestions, friends?

Monday, September 5, 2011

Simplicity

This weekend was filled with all of my favorite things. Friday was spent riding bikes, making music, snuggling, ended with a hair appointment! I love my new hair. Short again, brunette again. All is right with the world. Show at the park on Saturday which meant that Lucas got to spend the night with his cousins. Good music, good friends, good cause. I left very happy. Yesterday we slept in extra late until Lucas came home, then we all snuggled in our bed and watched a movie for a little while. We had our weekly "breakfast" date with Nono, which is really like lunch because it's at 11:30. We followed it up with a small bike ride. Lucas fell asleep in the car as soon as we got back in, so we just drove around chatting and looking for skate spots. We got a tasty treat, and then headed home so Lucas could "nap". That didn't happen, so eventually we went out and grabbed dinner and ran some errands.

It was a weekend full of simple pleasures. We had some adult time, though we were working. We had some really good family time. It was nice to get back to basics, and remember how we got started as a couple. We genuinely enjoy each other's company, even during mundane errands. Something as simple as a bike ride can reinvigorate our relationship, and bring us closer together. A leisurely car ride through our town, peeking around industrial parks and other rarely seen places can spark conversations about everything and nothing.

I'm looking forward to our anniversary next Monday, and John's birthday the following Monday. We are right where we need to be, looking forward to a fun fall.
"Fall Drizzle" - Leonid Afremov
www.afremov.com